Breaking News — press II press

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Good evening, folks. Welcome to WBRK, your radio station in Kingston, New York. This is your host, Dawn Hislop. At WBRK, we try our best to cover the most important and confounding stories of the twenty-first century.

We’ll start with international news. Major events are happening in foreign countries. Most listeners haven’t heard of those places, so they don't matter to this news program. Unless one of those countries attacks us, or we attack them.

Now we’ll move on to national news. Steven Pinker, a professor at Harvard, stated historical trends show that improvements in safety, health and technology have resulted in greater prosperity. Despite terrorism, genocide and everyday turmoil, he claims we’re killing and maiming less frequently than in earlier history.

But don’t be complacent. Other experts say Professor Pinker’s research, arguments and conclusions are flawed. We may report six shocking incidents of horrific violence that occurred today. Remember, we still have work to do to ensure safe communities.

In a groundbreaking national study, researchers discovered cats can turn any item into an impromptu toy. The researchers also revealed that felines have a sixth sense for finding expensive delicate things to knock off shelves.

Another national news story about an honest politician has just been handed to me. It’s already been extensively covered online. To voice your opinions about this significant story, please visit our website. However, please be aware that if it is a busy news day and online content is overflowing, smaller news items may never make it to our website. Unfortunately, our online readers may be slightly less informed.

Moving on to local news, an alarming incident has taken place. A woman has been arrested for stealing 20,000 gallons of water from the city. According to police reports, the woman illicitly siphoned water from a hydrant to fill her backyard swimming pool. When we have time, we’ll delve deeper into the motives behind this unusual lawbreaking. And we may study the consequences for our community.

Turning to the world of sports, we had the privilege of meeting a famous athlete. We asked her to answer a question without using the words “uh,” “like” or “you know.” She refused. We’ll discuss the significance of this later in the show.

In the entertainment world, a prominent Hollywood producer invited the public to say, “I swear true allegiance to entertainers who perform at the Super Bowl halftime show and to their heirs and successors. So help me, God.” Next month, we'll debate the implications and reactions to the producer’s unique invitation.

In celebrity news, we recognize famous actors are excellent at acting and singers sing well. Artists do have opinions on relationships with each other and other people. We here at WBRK wouldn't know anything about that because we are a news station. We maintain our focus on delivering the facts.

Lastly, here’s a young boy’s question for you to ponder. “Where do birds go during a storm?” This innocent query prompts us to explore the fascinating behaviors of our feathered friends during bad weather.

Next week, we’ll discuss suggestions for cures to human loneliness.

And that’s all the breaking news. Thank you for listening to WBRK, where we strive to inform and uplift our listeners.

Remember, Kingston, stay curious and have the courage to dance like nobody's watching.

Join us for the late news every night at 11 p.m. on WBRK.